Memorable Moments in Modern Drama: Purity of Essence

Ripper: Have you ever seen a commie drink a glass of water? Mandrake: Well, no I… I can’t say I have, Jack. Ripper: Vodka. That’s what they drink, isn’t it? Never water? Mandrake: Well I… I believe that’s what they drink, Jack. Yes. Ripper: On no account will a commie ever drink water, and not without good reason. Mandrake: Oh, ah, yes. I don’t quite.. see what you’re getting at, Jack. Ripper: Water. That’s what I’m getting at. Water. Mandrake, water is the source of all life. Seven tenths of this earth’s surface is water. Why, you realize that.. seventy percent of you is water. Mandrake: Uhhh God… Ripper: And as human beings, you and I need fresh, pure water to replenish our precious bodily fluids. Mandrake: Yes. chuckles nervously Ripper: You beginning to understand? Mandrake: Yes. chuckles. begins laughing/crying quietly Ripper: Mandrake. Mandrake, have you never wondered why I drink only distilled water, or rain water, and only pure grain alcohol? Mandrake: Well it did occur to me, Jack, yes. Ripper: Have you ever heard of a thing called fluoridation? Fluoridation of water? Mandrake: Ah, yes, I have heard of that, Jack. Yes. Ripper: Well do you now what it is? Mandrake: No. No, I don’t know what it is. No. Ripper: Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face? Window in the office is shot through by automatic weapons fire.

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