Is the National Academy of Sciences a terrorist group?

In a report to congress, the National Academy of Sciences had the gall to contradict well-established science fiction and suggest that the earth is hotter than it should be and it’s that way because of human activity.

The Earth is the hottest it has been in at least 400 years, probably even longer. The National Academy of Sciences, reaching that conclusion in a broad review of scientific work requested by Congress, reported Thursday that the “recent warmth is unprecedented for at least the last 400 years and potentially the last several millennia.”

A panel of top climate scientists told lawmakers that the Earth is running a fever and that “human activities are responsible for much of the recent warming.” Their 155-page report said average global surface temperatures in the Northern Hemisphere rose about 1 degree during the 20th century.

Obviously this is some sort of conspiracy on the part of those data-loving academics to keep corporate-sponsored research down. It’s a gross limitation of our freedom of expression and I don’t understand why we as Americans stand for it. And what about that name: National Academy of Sciences. Why, it might as well be “The People’s Academy of Sciences” for its clearly anti-corporate stances. Damn those scientists and their method! Damn their data! Damn them all!

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2 responses to “Is the National Academy of Sciences a terrorist group?”

  1. Tej
    Tej
    June 22, 2006 at 8:06 pm |

    It’s not global warming, it’s Intelligent Heating! God is trying to put those Satan-worshipping coat makers from Burlington, NJ out of business!

  2. Corey
    June 23, 2006 at 7:05 am |

    But that means that God is anti-business which is essentially anti-American. Oh no! The Taliban was right: we’re infidel pigdogs! It can’t… we’re not… I mean… but…

    Seppuku!

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