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A couple weeks ago, my cousins Heather and David gave birth to two very little boys, Jack and Ethan. They were born 14 weeks early on their parents’ anniversary.

Tomorrow (Thursday) morning, Ethan is having cardiac surgery. If you’ve got any spare bandwidth in terms of thoughts or prayers, everybody involved would appreciate it.

Update: The surgery went well. From my mom:

Just wanted you to know that Ethan’s surgery this morning went very well. The doctors were able to close the hole in his heart, and everything seems to be A-OK. Thanks so much for your thoughts and prayers. Mom and Dad seem to be holding up, although there were tears of joy and relief after they got the report from the doctors. Thanks again.

Center of the Earth
Originally uploaded by Corey Porter.

When you fire up Google Earth, it presents you with a “default” view that you can zoom in on. As it happens, this default point is two blocks from my parents’ home in Lawrence, KS. I’m told that the corner of Crestline Drive and Compton Square (Compton is the name of the owner of the apartment complex located at that intersection) became the center of the default view because the engineer who entered the defaults once lived in these apartments.

Hump, 15mph
Originally uploaded by Corey Porter.

Tuesday - yes, it was Tuesday when I saw my congressman coming out of the titty bar. He didn’t look like my congressman, but that’s okay. Nobody really looks like themselves anymore. I think its got something to do with that crap they’ve been pouring into the water.

I decided it might be wise to follow the congressman, just to see what he was up to. After all, my tax dollars do pay his salary. The congressman got into a taxi, so I hailed a taxi despite the obvious dangers involved, and the colored voices in my head began to sing: “All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall and I can hear it all, yes I can hear it all. All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall, and I can even hear the little insects crawl”

The congressman was in taxi number 23, and I was in cab 17, but numbers are meaningless in this kind of cat and squid game. My driver was an Aries, and he laughed when I said “Follow that cab!” And he kept laughing until he saw the cold blue steel of Little Elvis.

“Keep your god-damn hands off that radio!” I warned him “I work for the government!” This is actually a half truth. I’m really a bike courier, but I make a lot of deliveries to government offices. That’s where I heard about the cheese.

And the colored voices in my head kept singing: “All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall, and I can hear it all, yes I can hear it all. All I gotta do is put my ear to the wall, and I can even hear the little insects crawl”

There’s this super secret government program called “Operation: The Cheese Stands Alone.” It’s the congressmen’s pet project. They claim that they’re giving surplus cheese to the needy. I, of course, have my suspicions. After 15 very quiet minutes, the congressman’s cab pulled up outside a warehouse. I had the Aries circle around the building and drop me off. He seemed to be grasping the importance of my mission. Since he said I didn’t have to pay him. As long as I promised to stay very far away from him and his taxi. I swear, some people just don’t want to get involved.

So I walked into that cold dark place, Little Elvis drawn and ready for action. I too was ready - ready for the moment when I would be a real American.

— The Dead Milkmen, Peter Bazooka

Carter and The Kid in a BMW 530i
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

Carter, The Kid and I went to the “Taste of Lexus” event today (photo set). Held out at Dodger Stadium, it’s a chance for people to come out and drive Lexus’ cars around like idiots.

The event itself was pretty swank. There were some cool freebies, great free food, and the facilities were quite cool. Lines for the cars were relatively short, and they didn’t hassle you for pushing the cars. Good times. Here’s a quick run down of what we drove.

IS 350

The first car we drove, it was easily the most exciting as well. It’s small, light, powerful, and handles wonderfully. If you’re all about spending a lot of money on a car that has much more performance capability than you’ll ever be able to legally use, this is your car. I’m not by any stretch a car guy, but I was genuinely impressed by this one. It was as fun to drive as the Corvette that I drove at a GM event a few months back.

(Note to Carter: I will agree before I am even told that if I were to spend more than 30 seconds driving a Corvette then I would know now and forever that it is the greatest car ever made.)

GS 450

This is Lexus’ luxury/performance line. It had lots of low-end power, but its handling was crap. I felt like I was at sea because of the body roll. Carter, who is a somewhat more aggressive driver than I am (note: he’s actually a much more aggressive driver than I am), pretty well got it to go sideways around a couple of turns. Not a good sign at all.

BMW 530i

This didn’t have the speed off the line that the GS 450 did, but it handled almost as well as the IS. I felt much better pushing this in to turns than I did the previous car. On the down side, there were way too many wheels and knobs and lights on the inside. What’s that all about?

SC 430

Lexus’ little convertible was fun to drive. The handling wasn’t great and the power was sub-par, but the stereo sounded wonderful and the top was down while I spun its tires around the slalom course they had set up. I wouldn’t buy one of these, either, but it was definitely fun to drive.

GX 470

The Kid’s favorite car, this was a pretty typical SUV. It handled for crap and was under-powered for its size, but it sure was big and noisy. Why do people buy these stupid things?

RX 330h

The hybrid SUV (based on the Camry frame) was there as well. We drove it. It was nothing special. If you want to make people think you’re cool because you drive a hybrid but you still want to piss people off by driving an SUV, this is your car.

All in all, this was a fun event. You can’t beat the price (free), either. If you get a chance to go to one of these things, I would recommend doing so. They really are a lot of fun.

I ordered a pitcher at the last Chippy Friday ever
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

Today was my last day in Pasadena (photo set). It would have been sad, but it’s Chippy Friday and I ordered a pitcher all for myself, so it wasn’t.

On Monday I start in Burbank. I hope all you crazy kids who are staying behind have a good time. I’ll try to make Chippy Friday every now and again so I can still see you all.

See also: Tearing Down the YRL/Pasadena Server (photo set)

Skeleton
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

The Kid and I went trick-or-treating tonight (photo set). As we have for the last few years, we went up to the Halloween block party in Sierra Madre. It’s a super-impressive deal; a bunch of houses put what has to be weeks of effort in to decorating. There are hundreds of jack-o-lanterns, flying ghosts, graveyards and all manner of spooky and cool. If you’re looking for something to do next Halloween, I can’t recommend this enough.

Again, At Boardner’s
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

I would like to state, for the record, that I am offended by the Halloween patrons of Boardner’s (photo set). Yes, there were slutty devils and slutty schoolgirls and the three amigos and cops and state pen inmates, which, sure, is fine. But dammit, when I play Janis’ Bobby McGee, you don’t all need to go out for a smoke. It’s a good song. It’s an important song. Show a little respect.

Despite a complete lack of Foreigner on Boardner’s jukebox — I could have killed for some Double Vision or the Dirty White Boy — I think we did a pretty good job of rocking things out properly tonight. Justin Kick Started Our Hearts (and even played some Sinatra just for me), Joe told us a little story about Mr. Brownstone, and Darin let fly with the Subterranean Homesick Blues. Good stuff. I queued up Patsy Cline’s Crazy for a parting shot, only to be completely outdone by Justin’s subsequent playing of Willy Nelson’s cover of the same song. Truly it was an outstanding feeding of the monkey.

Epilogue: I got voicemail from Justin while he was driving from my place to the hotel. They were playing Hot Blooded on the radio. Rock out.

Chris, Justin and Darin got tickets.
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

Tip: if you’re in Manhattan beach, don’t *dare* cross the street when the “don’t walk” light is flashing. If you do, you will get a jaywalking ticket with a quickness.

Some friends are in town this weekend for a football game. I took a few pictures of the friday night leading up to the game (photo set). Enjoy.

Alex and The Kid, juggling
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

Lindsey, Alex, The Kid and I went apple picking (photo set) with some friends this last Sunday. It was a nice, sunny day, and a good time was had by all.

The Kid, carving (close up)
Originally uploaded by corey_porter.

Lindsey, The Kid and I carved jack-o-lanterns (photo set) yesterday. It was great fun, and we got two rad jack-o-lanterns and a big bowl full of roasted pumpkin seeds out of the deal. Yay!